Answers

I'm sure that all of you have been losing sleep, wondering what I am going to do.

First, should you ever get giant blisters, follow the advice from all the medical websites that I ended up reading and LEAVE THEM ALONE.  I thought that it was going to take weeks for mine to heal (that's how bad they were), but I kept them covered with antibiotic ointment and band-aids and they were better in a matter of days.  I also decided to suck it up and buy new shoes, so I am much happier now.  I am really trying to live a healthier lifestyle (I've been drinking spinach for breakfast and I like it), so not even The Husband complained about the shoes.*

I have been thinking, pretty much non-stop, about the job possibility and I've decided that I really want it.  I've talked to The Husband and we can make the traveling work.  There are negatives to it, of course, but also a lot of positives.  I've been thinking a lot about my stress level and what I can handle without going crazy throughout my job search.  Stress has played such a big part in my health--I wonder if things had been less stressful three years ago if it would have been as bad as it was.  In a lot of ways, this job has less stress than many of the others that I've applied for.  Due to the nature of the work, I think that I will get to leave it at the end of the day.  There will be fewer disasters at 4:30 on a Friday afternoon that I can't fix and thus spend all weekend stressing about.  I talked to the manager today.  I really like him.  (I am trying extremely hard not to get to sold on this job because I don't want to crash if I don't get it.)  When I had my phone interview last Thursday, the manager totally caught me by surprise, so he asked me to call him this week after I'd had some time to think.  I told him today that I'd done a lot of thinking about the job and the traveling and that it is something that I really want to do.**  I had several detailed questions about the position and I was trying really hard to sound smart.  I think that the manager let slip that I've made it to the next round of interviews, which will be in person and probably in Boston.  (It's very weird that they haven't met me yet.)  My fingers, toes, ankles and everything else is crossed--I will hopefully hear something next week. 

I've been feeling very happy and perky lately.  I am really hoping that this is a combination of trying to live a healthier life and feeling more positive about the job search.  I've been sleeping less, which is good.  Of course, I still feel like I can never really trust my body and every time I start to feel happy, I worry that it's the beginning of mania.  I pray that some day I will be able to feel my feelings without being scared of them. 

*I also had a coupon...

**Since I'm about ready to turn pro, or at least join the Olympic Interviewing Team, let me give some advice, should any of you have to interview again.  Tell the interviewer that you really want the job.  It will feel so weird and awkward the first time that you do it and you will totally feel like a dork.  Of course you want the job, you will be saying to yourself, they know that or why would I be putting myself through this form of torture.  I've had several people tell me that NO ONE actually asks for the job during an interview because it feels so weird.  Doing so shows how confident you are (even if you are trembling like a leaf on the inside) and the person interviewing you will get another hint of your fabulous-ness.  Because you are fabulous.

It's funny because it's in French

This may only be funny to me, but I've watched it about eight times now...

The Big Question

As many (if not all) of you will know, since you are my Facebook friends, I got a call today about a position that I interviewed for over 5 weeks ago.  My first interview was a phone interview and it was one of the first interviews that I did.  I did not feel good about it (there are still answers that are haunting me) and when I didn't hear back for such a long time, I figured that I hadn't made the cut.  Today they called and I had a nice conversation with the manager.  The position is with a good company that I have always admired.  It is an education specialist position and I know that I can do that job well.  There is one big question that I need to answer before I can move forward--do I want to start traveling again?

This job has a lot of travel--flying on a plane and staying out of town for several nights travel.  On the other hand, when I'm not traveling, I'd get to work from home again.  Since it's with a big company, I'm guessing that I'd have good benefits again.  (Benefits, I have missed you so...)  Parts of traveling used to be fun (although I rarely flew before).  The independent part of me would be happy to do that again.  But then I think of Sweet Pea and I wonder how she would do.  Part of me thinks that it would be better to have quality time with her, not quantity.  If I were making more money again we'd be able to do so much more fun stuff.  However, The Husband is bad at some things.  What would they eat when I was gone?  Tonight Sweet Pea got all upset because The Husband was doing her shower wrong.  (I was really angry because I was on the phone with my mom and had to get off to fix the shower situation.)  This summer I had planned to try out for the symphony chorus and I have been looking forward to that--I think that it's going to be hard (if not impossible) to commit to something like that if I'm gone a lot again.  On the other hand, this job will pay well.  I'm pretty excited at the thought of getting paid well again.  I don't want to make the wrong decision like I did with my triangle.

I'm putting the cart before the horse, since I don't have an offer or even the guarantee of another interview, but what do I do?

I took a walk. Wearing different shoes. And now I have giant blisters.

So, in an effort to be more healthy and to enjoy the beautiful weather (that makes me think a blizzard must be on the way, and not the Dairy Queen kind, although that would be tasty), I decided to take a walk.  Because it is warm out, I decided to wear some capri pants (even though I may have the whitest legs known to man), which made me decide to wear some different shoes.  Which (as you have inferred from the title of the post) gave me giant blisters all over my heels.  This is reinforcing my need/desire for new shoes.  I feel really bad buying anything (even gas and groceries) while I'm not working, but I think that I may be at critical mass here.  Of course, now my feet hurt too bad to go try on shoes or take another walk...which I guess is okay because I'm sure about the blizzard, even though the weather people disagree. 

I have another interview this afternoon.  I've lost count now with the number of interviews that I've had.  (At least, if I get called, the unemployment people won't be able to say that I haven't been trying.)  Today's has promise.  It is a small company, but they look like they are stable and growing.  Unfortunately, like everyone else in the universe, they have said up front that "they may have something in a few months."  The Husband thinks that I'm going to be inundated with offers, come May.  While that would be awesome, one offer right now would be cool. 

So to sum up for today...I'm anxious (pretty much about everything), I'm frustrated (as usual), I'm nervous for my interview (because I want something to work out so badly), and my feet hurt (see above.)  Good times.

Ch-Ch-Changes

I had another interview today and decided to change everything up.  I wore a dress with a cardigan, instead of my usual suit*.  I also put my hair up and over the weekend I treated myself to some new makeup (so it would actually look like I was wearing makeup).  Unfortunately, even though I had practiced with my hair, this morning when it actually had to go up properly, it wouldn't.  That's just how life works, though.

The interview itself went well.  I really liked the guy who was interviewing me and felt very at ease.  In addition to the new hair/new outfit, I decided to try something else new during the interview--actually telling the person what I really want in a new job, instead of telling them what I think that they want to hear, in the hope that I'll fit into their box.  Doing that was how I ended up in my Triangle in the first place.  I tried to fit somewhere where I didn't and the results were pretty disastrous.  I don't want to be a square peg in a round hole again.**  Thus far, I have three more interviews set up for the next two weeks.  I'm hoping to actually get to a second interview with someone soon.  In the meantime, I plan to stick with the plan of telling people what I actually want to do, even if it doesn't fit with them.  I'm no worse off than I am now, right?

And now to totally change the subject (yet keep within the theme of change).  If you haven't taken the time (about 30 minutes) to watch it yet, please view the video "Kony 2012" (which I have conveniently embedded for you).



Joseph Kony sucks.  He is the leader of the LRA, which is an army that is fighting basically for the sake of fighting in Central Africa.  For over 26 years he has been kidnapping children.  With a mixture of fear, drugs and systematic brainwashing, he forces the boys to become child soldiers and the girls to become sex slaves. He has kidnapped over 30,000 children.   I learned about him for the first time a few years ago when I met a priest who had been ministering to children who had escaped.  He is Number 1 on the list of criminals wanted by the ICC and the US Government has authorized 100 soldiers to assist the Ugandan army to bring him in and this is the year to do it.  Watch the video, repost it so your friends can watch it, and then call your senators and congress people.  Regardless of your political affiliation, as the video states " where you live should not determine whether you live.  Every child deserves the right to have a childhood." 

Thanks for listening--I will now get off of my soapbox.  

*I think I'm sticking with the dress plan, since my suit jacket doesn't fit well, especially since I've lost some weight.

**That's a lot of shapes, isn't it. 

This doesn't have anything to do with anything, except that it's one of the cutest things that I've ever seen and The Husband is mean and says that I can't get a pet baby sloth.




And if sloths aren't your thing, this is really amusing to me. (Warning--it does use f*ck, if you're at work or around kids.)