We're coming up on 1:48, which was the exact moment, one week ago that I knew that I was going to be fired. I started writing this really long post about getting fired, but you are never going to get to see that one. It made me too sad.
Instead, I will tell you that getting fired was like a bad breakup with your high school boyfriend. The Big Cheese actually said "it's not you, it's us." That is the one part that I look back on and kind of smile about--who says things like that.
I tried to take being fired with as much grace and poise as I could. Now that I've had two experiences, I think I'm a pretty easy person to fire. The first time, I actually ended up being the one to comfort The Man, who was having a very hard time with firing me. This time was face-to-face* and I had to try really hard to keep my emotions under control. Once I was safely out of the building I cried more than I have in a long time.
Thankfully we left last Friday to visit a very good friend and her family. They have a new baby, who I got to hold most of the weekend. Holding tiny babies may be the best form of therapy that there is**. There should be some kind of service where sad people come over to over-worked mother's homes and hold their tiny babies while the mothers get to take a nap. I am very grateful to my friend for sharing her baby. I hope she feels better soon too.
Yesterday I started feeling really sad. I think the shock of getting fired had warn off and the reality had set in. I received a small severance package from BCFG, so I gave myself this week to wallow, but I told myself that next week I had to really get serious about looking for a job.
Today a small miricle happened...last January when I was looking for a job*** I interviewed with a small financial practice and they offered me a job. I turned it down because BCFG offered me more money and the BCFG job fit in a little more with my skill set. Amazingly, the people that I turned down don't hate me. Even more amazingly, they are still looking for someone and heard through the (extremely small) grapevine that I was no longer with BCFG and they are still interested in me. I sent over an updated copy of my resume**** today and we are supposed to talk again on Monday.
Remember that work-related Star of Bethlehem that I was hoping would shine on me? It seems that it has, but it's coming from a totally different place. I'm a very religious person, but don't talk about it much. The fact that this job is still available and that these people actually want to talk to me kind of feels like God is saying "Yoo Hoo!! This is where you were supposed to be all along. Will you listen this time?"
This song is a little cheesy, but I've been singing it a lot in my head lately--kind of a soft spoken, girl battle song. We probably all need more of those.
*versus over the phone while I am sitting in a parking garage just after a hair cut
**As long as it's not yours and your suffering from one of the worst monsters out there, post-postpartum depression, and you're crying (for example) because your husband made himself a sandwich but didn't think to ask you if you were hungry too even though you had been nursing a baby with colic for about 24 solid hours...not that that happened or anything...
***I still can't believe that I had to do this a year ago. This better not become an annual thing.
****Which I hope is not too long...its so hard send out a little piece of paper that is expected to represent you.
Don't worry about your resume being too long. They always said 1 page. Mine is 2 pages with 1/4" margins, and I use every bit of it. I have 2 skills sections - 1 actual programs, the other life skills (like blogging!) and I have bulleted paragraphs under each job describing my duties. because I am not the average employee. I don't fit a mold, and I do so many non-traditional things within my positions. So... don't worry. They called you. They like you. And maybe this was where you were supposed to be all along. happy weekend, and keep us posted about Monday.
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